A Seedy Halloween

Edited by La Pantera Bonita

Everybody remembers where and how they lost their virginity. However, I doubt many of us have done so in a rite, with an audience. I still have nightmares about the night I lost my virginity.

I had just finished up Navy boot camp in Orlando, Florida. Like so many in my family before have done, when the nation calls, we serve. And we always serve in the Navy to avoid getting shot. Vietnam was winding down. No new troops were being sent over and intelligent geeks who volunteered for submarines would never get to see a rubber tree, except maybe in a picture. For some reason all my family and friends assumed I was going to serve on a gunboat in the Mekong Delta. Perhaps they got the idea from me. I neglected to mention the submarine stuff.

My cute girlfriend was waiting on me. Our relationship was at a point where we would engage in mutual masturbation at the end of a date. Okay, the last week I was getting some blowjobs, but we never had sex as defined in the Funk and Clinton Dictionary.

Terry had a nice build with shapely muscular legs and ass. Her pussy was tight with slightly darker hair. Her breasts varied between 34B and 36C cup sizes depending on maker of the bra and time of the month. She would let me play with her breasts while she would jerk me off.

Terry was at the house while we were carving our pumpkins. My older sister, Sarah (named for Mom) and family were down in South Carolina visiting us at the time. Her two children Todd, age 7 and Tony, age 5 were of course with her, and were all agog about carving out pumpkins. There were four of us carving at the table with newspapers spread out to prevent any sticky mess on the floor and table. Todd had his own pumpkin with only minor adult supervision, I was helping Terry carve some face, Felicia, my baby sister, and about 12 years of age (see MIKE RETURNS HOME when she becomes of age) had one corner. Sarah was helping Tony when she grabbed a hand full of slimy pumpkin carvings or pumpkin guts as we called them, and peered straight at Todd who was having the time of his life, oblivious to the world, creating the ultimate jack-o lantern. I positioned myself so as not to be without “ammo.”

Sarah reached across the table and mashed the pumpkin guts in her son’s face. My Dad, of all people, a spectator in all of this, hurled pumpkin guts in my direction, only to catch Terry straight in the face. What happened next was a pumpkin gut throwing frenzy. Mom was picking pumpkin guts off her kitchen wall a week later remarking, “How the heck did it get there?”

Terry ran outside the house, very flustered. I followed closely. She reached down inside her bra and was pulling out slimy seeds. “I don’t think your Dad likes me.” Terry said, nearly in tears.

I wrapped my arms around Terry and assured her that my whole family loved her, or else they wouldn’t be treating her as one of their own, i.e. she gets abused too. I told her to consider herself initiated into the family. She now wishes she had tossed some guts back at Dad. I told her to wait until next year or sometime when he doesn’t expect it.

My mother Sarah and my sister Sarah were busy cleaning up the kitchen as the kids were putting the finishing touches on the jack-o-lanterns.

Terry says every Halloween her and her sisters go up in the mountains and asked if I would join them this year. I consented to her request. There might be a hand job, or better yet a blow job at the end of the night.

Terry’s older sister Debbie, about 24 joined us on our trek to a place outside of Ashville, North Carolina. Debbie was currently working a divorce and was now living at home with Mom with her two young children. When I first met Debbie she had two black eyes. Seems her soon to be ex-husband roughed her up a bit. Debbie was built similar to Terry. She was short, with nice legs and tits. Her ass was a bit on the thin side, but not a serious defect. When she got a few drinks in her, Debbie would typically get on a table and shake her tits. I felt a bit embarrassed whenever she would do this, Terry would shake it off. It was after all her sister shaking her tits. None of her family seemed to have blamed her husband for having beaten Debbie with an ugly stick. I wouldn’t dare speak up.

Terry’s younger sister was 18, a year younger than me and two years younger than Terry. She was a beauty and knew it. Terry was a bit jealous of Beth. She was careful not to give her any preferential treatment at Christmas and Easter over her other 8 siblings. Terry’s mom was a breeder with four husbands under her skirt. Technically Debbie was Terry’s half sister, Beth was a full sister.

Beth stood apart from her sisters. She was tall and slender with long straight blonde hair that went to the middle of her back. Her face had a small amount of freckles, just enough to make her look young and fresh. She had nice firm pointy breasts, not overly large, but big enough to know she was woman. Beth could have been a model if she was bent that way, but had just a touch of independent defiance in her to prevent her from doing anything degrading or demeaning, unless she was in charge.

I picked up Terry and her sisters at her trailer. Terry had moved away from the nest and was sharing a place with her step-brother. The girls had a small suitcase with them. I was puzzled. “Are we going to spend the night in Ashville?”

Terry said, “No” that Beth felt she needed to bring a change of clothes along. I loaded the suitcase into the trunk of my Volkswagen 411 which my neighbor Larry gave me a great deal on. The 411 wasn’t the worst car Volkswagen ever made or this the worst deal I ever made on a car…. Well actually it was. It was a piece of shit car that frequently broke down and I got took. If you’re reading this Larry, I am coming after you and your descendants-you bastard! You hear me Larry! I thought things would get better when I unloaded that vehicle and got an Audi Fox.

Anyway we made it to Asheville and went to the zoo during the day. The zoo at this time was not well kept. The cages were very close to the customers with large openings in the fences. It was more of a petting zoo, but not by design. I suggested a trip over to the Biltmore, but the girls had other plans and directed me to dive out of town. We drove into the woods at a spot where I-40 would one day be. We parked in an open field where other cars had been parked. There were a couple of trucks with number 43 on the back with large barbeque grills on the back. Beth grabbed the bag out the back and opened it up. She unfolded three long white gowns which the girls placed on over their clothes. They placed garlands on their heads, and then removed their clothes from under their gowns. AS far as I could tell they were all naked underneath as I placed myself in a position to where they would be standing between me and the setting sun….hmm they were naked all right judging by the dark triangle shaped patches between their legs.

Now at this point you might think I would be asking some questions. And I did. However Terry was quick to the point. “Just be quiet and go along with it and you might have yourself a good time.”

The girls took my hand and led me down a path in the woods. In fact we were all holding hands. Terry had us arranged so I was holding her hand and Debbie’s hand, but not Beth’s hand. I made a mental note of this.

We got to a clearing and there were a bunch of people dressed like the girls. In fact I was the odd ball in the place. They were cheerful when they meet the group and hugged as old friends all saying “Happy Samhain” and “blessed be”. They introduced me to the group, but there were so many, I couldn’t remember all the odd names. I noticed everyone was coupled off. I was the only one who brought three dates.

The girls’ names were altered within the group. Terry was now known as Terra. Beth introduced herself as Beth-el. And Debbie was still fucking Debbie. I was hoping they had beer.

When the sun dipped over the horizon the festivities began. There were two dozen stones arranged in a large circle. They were placed upright and varied in sizes, but were about 3 feet high, about the size of a tombstone. I found one that made a comfortable chair to lean against. Terry quietly shook her head “no” as I attempted to relax. There were two stones with no one in front of them. In the center of the circle was a large cauldron with glowing charcoal, a large stone altar and incense burning- sandalwood of course, like they don’t make anything else. Outside of the circle there were picnic tables set up with food. I was eyeballing the food and all the women naked under their robes when a couple appeared from the woods. They had on very flimsy outfits. They were light see-through material that was cut short. When I say cut short I mean I could see the woman’s pussy; and if I so desired the guy’s nut sack peeking out the bottom. The see through material revealed a set of 36C breasts resting on the priestess’ chest. She had seen better days, and I had seen better tits, but right now, that was the best show in town. I cautiously looked over at Terry in front of her rock. She mouthed a reassuring kiss at me and smiled.

The male in the group was carrying a home made scepter with a doll head mounted on the end and small ornate bells along the shaft. The High Priestess sprinkled some incense on the cauldron and had her male consort hold some candles for her as she read from an old parchment:

“Lord of the Shadows, God and Giver of Life The one who sees all, and knows of our Death I beseech thee to open wide the gates which we must all pass Return this night our dear ones who have passed And when our time comes allow us to do the same. Let us be reborn again by the Great Mother Terra So we can enter your realms refreshed to be with our dear ones. Come to us, your servant and priest.”

At this point each woman was called forward, doffed their robe and given a five fold kiss (feet, knees, womb, breasts, and lips.). The women joined hands and walked around in a circle. There were titties and pussy galore. I watched Terry or Terra and her sisters walk in a circle like old pros. There were some clockwise turnings, some more incantations to the various compass points, a reverse in the circle turning, a little drinking from the altar chalice, some consuming of consecration cakes (devil’s food?) and then things started to break up; with the girls putting their robes back on. Just like that it was over, or at least I thought when the near naked dude with the doll’s head came to me and handed me his dumb wand, and proclaimed, “Behold the new Lord of Misrule, yours is to do what you desire for the evening, take the mickey out. No one is immune to your desires. Now consummate the rite with your chosen consort. Plant your seed”

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I reached into my pocket and sure enough there was a pumpkin seed. How did this guy know it was there when I didn’t? I was given a robe to wear. Not one of those nice long white ones, but one of those short see through ones, that had my mickey hanging out. I hung my clothes on the rock. I was concerned about the limited funds in my wallet, but it seemed like a bad time to be distrusting of my host and hostess who were making me a “Lord”.

Now I was wondering about the exact meaning of the words and phrase “consummate” and “plant your seed.” I was entertaining sexual ideas. The pumpkin seed I surmised was a red herring. I was uncertain what to do at this point. I looked to Terry for some help and held out my hand to her. After all she was Terra and I didn’t want to upset her or anger all the gods in the forest. Actually it was her wrath I feared most.

Terra slowly led me over to the altar. It may have looked like I was doing the leading, but I was still semi-clueless at this point. We got to the foot of the altar when Terry turned around and faced me. She gave me a long wet passionate kiss, followed by a five point kiss. Terra then dutifully lay down on the altar, on her back and slid her robe up to reveal her pussy to me and all the forest denizens.

This was the first good look I ever had of a real live pussy. Looked like the ones in Playboy magazine, although not as airbrushed. I knew what to do, but I didn’t have a boner. I was a bit embarrassed. Normally I sport one all the time. However, in front of a crowd, I had some minor problems. Two of the young ladies from the group came to my rescue. With their robes still on, but hanging seductively off their breasts, they knelt on the ground by me and stroked my thighs, without touching Mr. Mickey. As I was getting aroused, one of the maidens was blowing on my dick. I wanted to tell her that “blow” was just an expression, but everyone seemed solemn at this point.

Once aroused I mounted myself on top of Terra. My cock easily slid into her pussy. This was a new sensation for me. It didn’t feel like a blow job or a hand job. The intense warmth generated by the pussy caught me off guard. I was expecting something so wet to be cool, instead of warm. The women joined in a circle and walked clockwise around us chanting a chorus to Osiris and Isis, who we seemed to represent at the moment.

“Spear to the Cauldron Lance to the Grail Spirit to flesh Man in woman Sun and earth Lord of life arise Osiris and Isis blessed be”

There is nothing like sexual references in religion to get me off. Terra was moving her hips repeating, “Give me your divine seed Osiris.” I didn’t even mind being called by the wrong name…. I wondered how she would like it. Her hip movement threw me off. I thought she was just supposed to lay there while I did all the fucking. Apparently I was not cumming fast enough. That would not be a problem. As the women circled around, they removed their robes, to show me all their glory. I caught Beth at the corner of my eye. She had a beautiful pussy to match her hair. It looked so warm and inviting. I held Terra by her ass for a moment to stop her rhythm that was upsetting my own, and planted my seed inside of her.

The women shouted with joy. The men folk had brought out the grills and were cooking steak and vegetables saved from the Pooka. I walked around with that poor excuse for a hospital robe still on with my ass and dick still hanging out. We sat down at the picnic tables to feast.

Terry said to me, “Having a good time My Mischief King?”

“Just as long as you are my queen” I replied.

There was a campfire behind us. Terry grabbed some chestnuts and placed them on the fire to roast. The nuts popped and splattered. One of the shrapnel hit me solid in the chest. The High Priestess said that was a sign from the goddess that we should forever be joined. Later I would find out she must have meant the goddess of discord. But nothing could go wrong tonight.

Terry got our steaks as we sat at the table. Terry sat to my left and Beth to my right. (How Terry let this slip by, I don’t know.) Terry was cutting up my steak and feeding it to me. We seemed to have a problem in paradise. Terry liked her steaks rare. I liked mine cooked. Rare was a bad phrase to use, because it implies the steak did spend some time on the grill. I had trouble chewing the bloody piece of meat and managed to wash it down with some malted beverage. I wasn’t even keeping an eye on Debbie at this point to see when she would start shaking her tits. It felt like I swallowed half a cow that night.

Beth-el had placed her hand on my naked thigh and gave it a gentle squeeze. Reflexively I had another hard-on.

I looked at Terry, took her by the hands and said, “The Mischief guy wants to plant more seed.”

Terry said back to me, “You have already planted your seed in me, Osiris; you must plant it elsewhere so it can sprout.”

My eyes must have out grown my head when Terry said that as she continued, “This is your night, I won’t be angry with you, go and take whom ever you find desirable. It is your duty. You are expected to perform again.”

I didn’t need a lot of encouragement. I was a bit green, but not stupid. Besides everyone thought I was going to die in Vietnam next year. I went up to the High Priestess, who in spite being the oldest person in the group, (mid thirties) had the biggest titties. I asked her to escort me to the altar. She told me, she had to obey me as do all the women here, clearly a dozen of them.

The Priestess stood at the foot of the altar. She still had on her see through half robe with pussy visible from the bottom. I gave her a five fold kiss. I planted a good hard kiss on her lips, which was a bit of a shock to her, then placed my hands on her shoulders forcing her down to her knees in front of me. The High Priestess knew what to do with my scepter. She grasped my shaft and placed the end in her mouth. She made long strokes as my cock glided across her lips. The Priestess then pulled my cock from her mouth and pressed it against her parted wet lips. She stuck her tongue out just enough to lick the underside of my dick. With one hand she caressed my balls until they were round and full. Then she licked them too. Damn! I hoped Terry was taking notes. This was her idea.

Once I was ready to cum, the High Priestess stopped and whispered, “You must plant your seed inside Mother Earth, it can not grow on unhallowed land.”

From that I surmised I wasn’t going to cum in her mouth. That indeed would be a tough way to make her pregnant even for a fertility goddess. The High Priestess laid herself open to me. She spread her legs wide apart and held them up in the air with her hands. I noticed a scar- a hysterectomy as it turned out. Looks like the fertility goddess still has her work cut out for her. I penetrated the bearded well of the Priestess. It was not nearly as tight as Terry’s pussy. I reached up and touched the titties of the High Priestess. I never felt the titties of a Priestess before. They were bigger than Terry’s titties and a lot softer, but lacked her firmness. Since Terry was my first and only fuck up to this point in my life, I compared everything to her pussy.

I was rhythmically fucking the Priestess. She was moving her hips slightly, and in rhythm with my movements. I wished Terry was taking good notes. With the squeezing of her tits I came inside the old sacred well that had dried up years ago.

We returned to the table area. I needed some more of that sacred malt beverage, which sprang forth from a silver well of life, placed on the back of a moving pedestal with the sacred number 43 printed squarely on the back. If Terry can become Terra and Beth become Beth-el, I was changing Michael to Michelob.

It appears no one had a sense of humor about my name change. I was not taking the religion seriously. They extend their friendship, open themselves up to me, allow me to have sex with any of their women and all I cared about was beer and blowjobs. At 18 I had already established my life priorities.

There was some more dancing in a circle, a little chanting and some good luck spell casting etc. I participated in these activities as best as I could without being irreverent to whatever it is they were worshipping. The High Priestess blessed the union between Terra and the kid, although she referred to me as Michael instead of Michelob. This was important to Terry.

Things were winding down. Beth informed me that I had only one hour left as Lord of Misrule. I didn’t know I had a time limit on this reign. I was hoping it would last a few life times. I took that as a hint. I gathered both Beth ands Debbie and suggested a three-some, even though I had only enough seed for one of them. This raised a few eyebrows amongst the crowd, but I figure they should all be glade I wasn’t fucking their wife, except for the High Priest whose old lady I already plowed.

Debbie took the lead on this one as she was more experienced. Beth was no virgin, seems I was the only virgin in this group, but she lacked Debbie’s know how. This time I was placed on the altar and my robe was parted. Debbie stood on one side and Beth on the other still in their white garb. Debbie eagerly gobbled down my dick as Beth licked my balls. Beth didn’t care too much for me. She thought I was a geek, and maybe she was correct. I certainly didn’t have her cool. However, Beth also liked to piss off Terry, and what better way than to fuck her boyfriend in front of her face.
The double tongues on my cock made me rock hard in a second. Debbie doffed her robe and mounted me. She was bouncing up and down on my cock like she was in a rodeo. She was also making those “Yee-Ha” rodeo noises at the top of her lungs and shaking her tits. The sacred malt beverage had taken over a few brain cells.

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Beth was at a loss to do, so Debbie suggested she sit on my face so I could eat her pussy. I had never eaten a pussy before, even Terry’s. I wasn’t sure what to do. I figured the best thing for me to do was to try to fuck it with my tongue, as if my tongue was a dick. Beth slipped off her robe. I loved her pert firm titties. I could look at them all day. She spread her legs open and sat on my face, looking at her sister Debbie. Her pussy had the fresh smell of Jean Nate Cologne that Terry and I got her last Christmas. I stuck my tongue upward into her snatch, although I was more interested in simply looking at the thing than eating it. I had never seen a pussy this close before, or for that matter an ass.

I was somewhat eating out my girlfriend’s sister, about the best a kid could do who never heard of a clitoris. In fact when Beth’s clit popped out it scared the fuck out of me, I thought she had grown a dick, I had to pause for a moment. I made careful movements of my tongue to avoid touching that thing; it might have gotten bigger on me.

I was good at feeling tits and I had four of them at arm’s reach. Beth’s tits were on the small side, but firm. They had a very high youth appeal to them. Debbie’s tits on the other hand (literally) were slightly larger, but lacked firmness. They looked great when she had them shaking in a bra. However, they lacked charm once let loose to roam freely about the forest.

I wanted to fuck Beth, not Debbie so I suggested they swap places. When Beth placed her wet tight pussy on my dick, I nearly came before she could get mounted properly. Debbie was not as pleasant smelling or tasting as Beth. However, she knew I couldn’t eat pussy worth a lick. She turned herself around still straddling my face. She pulled her cunt hairs back and opened up her lips and pointed to her clit. “See this thing?”

I gave a quick “ah ha” as she pointed to some grotesque female dick located inside the vagina. What a cruel trick the gods were playing on me. Not one but two deformed women with small dicks in them.

She said, “You are supposed to lick that – move your tongue rapidly across it.”

I was horrified but obeyed. I could have pulled rank on her; after all I was the Lord of Something or other. As I licked her clit as she commanded, I noticed Debbie getting wetter and smellier. In fact there was a lot of liquid coming out of her. It wasn’t urine, but it didn’t taste that great either. I didn’t know if I was supposed to eat this stuff, or would it be another faux pas on my part to spit it out. I had enough people pissed at me.

I closed my eyes, and just kept licking her dick, (I don’t care what she called it, and I knew Terry wouldn’t have something like that in her pussy.) and tried not to drown. I could still feel Beth on me as she was taking long slow strokes, enjoying my dick. The excitement level was building. I increased my pelvic movements building to a climax.. I think Beth faked her level of excitement in order to irk Terry. I wasn’t sure what the fuck dick lady was doing on my face, but it was rank.

Beth moved her ass with my thrusts. I had a hold of Debbie’s tits when I finally came in Terry’s sister. Beth and Debbie got off of me as I sat up. There was still cum on my dick, which Debbie grabbed and licked clean. What the fuck’s the matter with her? I thought. Didn’t she eat with the rest of us?

We made it back to the table area. The High Priest said my reign was almost over, that there was just one last ritual. They brought out a wooden chair, which acted as a throne for me to sit upon. I felt honored. The men gathered around, and before I knew what was happening I was gagged and bound to the chair. I could hear the icy Cold Finger of death point at me and say, “I don’t expect you to talk. No Mr. Bound I expect you to die.”

The High Priestess read another passage:

“Accept our offering oh Dark One, We thank you for the harvest, Purify us with the fire of life We give you our Lord.”

I didn’t like this part too much. I struggled as best as I could, but the ropes were too tight. I espied a couple of women holding on to Terra’s arms as the men carried the chair to a small deserted wooden shack.

I kept up my struggle until I got a splinter. Oh great, now I would have to sleep on my side for a few days. Mom would be pissed. I had promised her I would never die trapped inside a Thomas Tryon novel.

They placed the chair in the center of the room and walked out. Then the witches set the door on fire. The women were outside chanting again. Damn it! My last moment on earth and I have to spend it on listening to women talk to a minor fire god. Hey Vulcan was a fire god! Live long and prosper…ya that’s my motto, yes sir, live and let live, – that’s me.

Well I didn’t fucking die, or for that matter get my hair singed. The High Priest, the guy whose wife I fucked, came in from the back wall (it had a couple of large holes in it) and cut me loose. We slipped out the back where no one could see us.

He informed me that it was never their intention to kill me. However, a human sacrifice was part of the ritual, and this mock death is what they did every year.

I volunteered to be the guy to fuck all women next year too, if they needed one. I did see a few babes I wanted to bang and I promised to leave his wife alone this time.

The High Priest chuckled at my offer, but this would not be possible as I was dead to the community. My rock or the one I stood by at the beginning of the ceremony was being turned over as we spoke. I could no longer be associated with this coven.

He led me back to the clearing where the cars were still parked and gave me a good-bye hug. I felt a little awkward- two guys in see through hospital robes hugging in the woods, while I was trying to work a splinter out of my ass.

The girls were waiting by the car. They had already changed into their regular clothes and had my other clothes in their hands. I quickly changed clothes and tossed my special robe into the tailgate of old number 43. Terry gave me a big hug and a kiss and thanked me for coming along with her and not “causing any kind of scene.” Yes, those were her exact fucking words.I would have to choose my next witticism wisely.

We drove home that night, even though it was very late. I switched on the radio. The Raspberries were blasting away their hit song, “I Wanna be With You”. Spirits were running high as we sang along to the radio with modified lyrics:

“Baby oh, I wanna be with you, So bad, yeah and your sister too.”

Eric Carmen-eat your heart out.

I figured Terry would be a great catch- a woman who let’s me fuck her sisters on the holidays, and she had three more sisters up and coming. We eloped two days later. And as you could have guessed, I never had sex with any of her sisters again, although Beth would occasionally flash her tits at me when we would visit her folks, but only if she knew Terry was looking too; anything to piss her sister off. And I had to pretend I didn’t like it.

So what did we learn here today? Sex between two people is a wonderful, beautiful thing- with three it’s fantastic.

This chapter is the first in a series of episodes describing the sexual autobiography of NaughtyMike. Should you desire to continue the saga, chronologically the rest would go: 1) Terry Takes on the Navy, 2) Mike Returns Home 3) Nancy the Drama Teacher, 4) Anita Biggerstaff, 5) On The Block chapters 1-12 (you figure the order) 6) Three for Tammy and 7) The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down. Should you make it through all these adventures, I would suggest you then take the quiz in my reader’s guide which explains all the puns you might have missed. “A Seedy Halloween” and “Anita Biggerstaff” are not included in the quiz.

Don’t forget to vote for some fucking lame Goth vampire Finkelstein shit kid tripe for best Halloween story.

NaughtyMike Family recipe for Pumpkin seeds.

Separate the seeds from all the pumpkin guts. Wash in a colander to remove more guts. Place in a pan with 1 to 2 inch sides. Dry out for out about 15 minutes in oven at about 200 degrees. Crank up the heat between 300 and 350 degrees. Add butter- real fucking butter, not margarine. Toss at least a stick or two in there, about one stick per pumpkin. The butter should melt as to be sufficient enough for the seeds to float freely. Don’t forget to add an unhealthy amount of salt. Check on the seeds from time to time. I normally will toss in another half stick of butter in about 15 minutes of bake time and add some more salt. Have your girlfriend blow you while watching Debbie Does Dallas. Check on seeds again. Normally 45 minutes of total bake time will do, although I have gone longer because the bitch wasn’t concentrating. Seeds should be dark brown around the edges, crispy and most of the butter boiled off. Add more salt. I like to eat them (shell and all) while the butter on them is still hot. After eating all the seeds from 2 pumpkins prepared in this manner-if done properly, you should have trouble breathing, and your left side will feel a bit numb. Don’t panic, these are typical signs, they normally pass.

Updated: April 16, 2018 — 3:27 AM

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