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A Hall Pass for the Wife

“This one, email her.” She scrolled up and down looking at the pictures on the woman’s profile. “Really?” “Yes. Of all the one’s we’ve looked at. She is the one I want, I just hope she thinks I am hot too.” “I am sure she will. She is totally not what I expected.” I started to draft an email. It was our 7th anniversary. The seven-year itch. We had been watching a movie, it was one of those late night “Adult” features on cable. It wasn’t real porn but every twenty minutes or so, two very attractive models who couldn’t act worth shit rolled around mostly naked. “I’m nervous. What are you going to say?” In this ridiculous movie, the two main characters were having their seventh anniversary, just like us. They had decided to fend off the seven year itch, they both got a hall pass. She was the […]

A Handyman's Memoir Ch. 09

After an enjoyable drive back from Penny’s place in the old Ferrari, we arrived in the village of Lake Placid. We made our way out the East side of town towards Whiteface, and after a while came to the end of Chrissy’s long driveway. As soon as we turned onto it we saw a small car approaching, with a mountain bike on a roof rack. “Oh my god it’s Nicki!” Chrissy said, with some panic in her voice. “I completely forgot about her.” A pretty young girl smiled and waved at us as she passed, and she turned her car around behind us and followed us back up the long driveway towards the house. Chrissy quickly explained. “She’s my neighbor’s daughter back home. She started school up here at Paul Smith’s College last fall, and her mother told me she decided to stay in an apartment with some of her […]

A Handyman's Memoir Ch. 10

Nicki and I woke alone in the bed to a bright sunny morning. The air smelled clean from the overnight rains, and songbirds were happily flitting around in the trees outside the big screened windows. Nicki’s long blonde hair was messy and she looked very sexy, with a wonderful look of satisfaction on her smiling face. “Good morning lover,” I said. “Oh Steve,” she said softly, “you were so wonderful last night.” She giggled a little. “I’ve been waiting years to say that to someone like you.” We heard Chrissy come up the stairs and she entered carrying a tray with coffee and more of her homemade sticky buns. She had a wonderful happy glow about her. I was glad to see it after her sad revelation in the night. We all sat on the bed and filled our hungry stomachs, me cross-legged and the girls with their legs curled […]

A Handyman's Memoir Ch. 14

Monday it was back to reality after the incredible weekend at Penny’s camp. I slept late into the morning, poured a cup of strong coffee, and reluctantly checked my work messages. I was happy to see there was only one, from a rather nervous sounding woman named Julia. Actually, most of a handyman’s customers are women who live alone, and it’s not surprising that the first contact with me is a bit nervous for some of them. I called Julia back and she said she found me in the yellow pages. She had a broken screen in her front door, and I told I could fix it that afternoon. Often times the first job someone hires me for is a small one, so they can get an idea if they feel comfortable with me working in their home. After I had lunch I drove over to her house. It was […]

A Handyman's Memoir Ch. 26

Lee and I only saw each other occasionally over the next few weeks. Summer is a busy time at a hospital emergency room, and her schedule was crazy. Her two daughters were around more I think, but since I couldn’t see their camp through the trees I’m not sure how much they were there. Occasionally I’d see one or both of them paddle by in a kayak — they always went slowly and checked my place out thoroughly. If I was outside they’d give me a good looking over, but always from a distance. One evening I had fallen asleep reading a magazine on a chaise lounge in the gazebo on the dock. It was getting dark and no lights were on in the camp, so it looked like I wasn’t home. I woke to the sound of young girls voices and giggling, and I turned my head as Becka […]

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